I remember January first,2010 ! 12:04 a.m. i was in church and all i remember our pastor saying was that this will be the year everything is returned to you in a different form ! & i believe that, i literally remember being completely happy around May ! that's a couple of days away from a year ago ! where did all of my happiness go? i don't know ! He literally broke me down to my knees, and kicked me to make sure i was down ! but i'm such a strong individual that it's going to take more than a kick to keep me down! i promise, GOD is on my side and he always will be so i never worry because i can do all things through him who strengthens me ;)! my happiness was completely GONE but i'm getting that happiness back through an amazing guy by the name of jose michael bojorquez and he's so amazing. i've never dated anyone like him so it's new for me. i have the army in my life now, it's so cool everything i'm learning. i've never knew this side of life cause i was always jst worrying about my ex and his antics. (sidenote: ladies, never put a BOY before your own needs, notice i said boy and not man)! this guy, he's so passionate and i love the fact he reads, he skates, and he's smart! NOT too many guys can fall under that and make it amazing, but he does ;)!

other things going on in my life : I FINALLY GRADUATE IN JUNE! my senior year has been the rockiest year of my highschool life,to almost dropping out to become a med.assistant to paying a grip of money for homeschooling, to being a freshmen all over again in texas, to crying my eyes out everyday jst worried about what im going to do, it happened but it's working out perfectly fine now! i'm with my class and im holding a 3.7 GPA! so yes life is great! the army in august, i think i want to leave before then, and i will if they let me! a walk for aids in MAY ;)! new friends in my life [mrs.azsha ortega smith]LOL! my birthday is so closeeee lol, mother's day is approaching ;)! summer is extra close! SOOOO MUCH! i plan on moving to honululu when i get in the military ;)! guys lifeeeee is so amazing ! im so thankful for everything that happened, GOD is so good i promise, he is! if you're struggling with something, seek him ! sure you're family and friends can give you advice BUT only god has the answer . trust me i know !

I've matured a lot since a certain situation, and i still have some more maturing to do, but i can say i'm grateful because my life is just beginning, i'm almost 18 and i want to be a responsible adult . i've learned a lot about myself, staying away from the drama and jst letting all of the positivity in ;) everything is starting to come together, and that's a blessing! I'm gaining friends ;) i rarely talk to kids at my school though because we're there for a reason and i don't need distractions. but when im out on the town, i conversate and people are so friendly, NOT completely letting everyone in though ! i just know that my direction of life, is a great path! i actually kinda feel like THE ROAD NOT TAKEN-edgar allen poe ! i've never taken this road, i've taken other roads more than once, but never this road and i'm feeling so great about this! my child will be so proud of me, i guarantee that!

p.s. i'll be blogging a lot now ;)!