Late Night THOUGHTS ...

I'm a smart young woman with a nice future ahead of herself;
i have goals and i will be successful, doesn`t have much but also
doesn`t ask for much and it still seems as if its not enough or never
will be enough for others. I can`t stress how i try to be the perfect
girlfriend and try to be the shoulder to cry on and its still not enough.
i`m not a gold digger . but i also can`t give much . and i thought you understood
that . i`m jst not getting where i made a mistake; i`m imperfect like the rest of
the world; but i`m loving and caring and willing to go that extra mile; but i jst
don`t understand where i went wrong . it`s so crazy i promise .i promised myself i
wouldn`t talk or blog about it but i jst can`t hold it in another second. it`s a really stressful situation and i don`t know how i brought it upon myself; it`s crazy; i jst don`t know how far i`ll go before i'll want to blow up; along with moving on comes with memories everytime you look, hear, or touch something or someone . trying to hide feelings that you know will be there for a while . trying to stay positive when everything around you seems negative . trying to focus cause if i daydream all i think and see is you . going places cause i know we`ve been there before . going back to the school where i`ll have the same teachers you had . sitting in the same seat you sat in . listening to music i normally listen too cause every song i listen to reminds me of you or something you did or said . twittering an update after you cause it will feel like i only tweeted so you can acknowledge my presence . picking up the phone because all i`ll want to dial is your number . logging on to myspace cause all i`ll do is go check for your recent updates and comments. but i won`t log onto your name cause i`ll think you`ll know im on it . all of that comes along with moving on . TRUTH IS i don`t even want to move on . but i see there`s no other option . cause it`s what you want right; second year in a row i`ve been in love with you and you`re missing my birthday AGAIN . well i can`t even find an ending point to this blog cause all i want to do is jst write about how i feel but there`s so many emotions going inside of me that i`ll meet the end of my characteristics even though i doubt there`s an ending to them . i mean i love you so much ; but i jst don`t know . DON`T KNOW WHAT ? i don`t know . all i know is that i love you .....